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A Friend Indeed




Hi dear readers. I've been busy lately so I did not have the chance to update the blog. I spent 3 days in Dubai and two more in Abu Dhabi and tomorrow I am heading back to Stockholm to get some stuff done. I wished I could extend my trip here but unfortunately, there is the profession stuff waiting for me to handle.

My desrest friend who invited me here did all her best to make this trip joyful and stressfree. She helped me relax and take time to recharge and reconsider things that are going on at the moment. We spent hours chatting, having fun, laughing and hanging out just like our old days.. eating good food and she took me to explore nice places in UAE. I can not be more thankful for these 6 days I spent here with her. I was not so interested in the touristic side of the trip here. All I needed is a good quality time with my friend. 



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UAE Trip

Hello again! you guys must have seen from my Instagram photos that I am in Dubai / Abu Dhabi this week. It feels amazing to be back to one's first culture and language. It's been ages!!! and add up on it meeting my best old friend whom I haven't seen in 8 years. 

It's so lovely in here and I gotta admit I was lucky with such amazing weather, not too hot at all or humid. I decided I just want to spend quality girls time with my gf so I did not plan lots of sightseeing and activities around here thinking I will for sure come back another time when the conditions are much better. 

We stayed in a nice hotel Aloft Palm. Ate in a lot of nice restaurants, been to lounges and tried a beauty salon experience where the staff was very professional and caring. I did not take the camera with me this trip so I collected these photos from Pinterest.  Gratitude!







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Duck Syndrome

Duck syndrome, also referred to as the Stanford duck syndrome or ugly duckling syndrome, is not formally recognized as a mental illness but refers to a phenomenon that has primarily been described in college students. Specifically, it is thought to afflict students who are overly invested in looking like they have it all together, and like a duck, appear to be calm and placid on a superficial level but are paddling frantically to "stay above water" in terms of meeting the academic, social, and community demands of getting a college education or beyond. Duck syndrome seems to be one way that depression, anxiety, or the initial stages of many mental illnesses can appear (manifest), usually in reaction to stress. Due to the known potentially devastating consequences of depression or anxiety, duck syndrome should be taken quite seriously and aggressively treated. Read more here



What is the treatment for duck syndrome?

Treatment for duck syndrome may include alleviating any medical condition that causes or worsens the associated depression, anxiety, or other mental illness. For example, a person who is found to have largely fluctuating blood sugar levels might receive medication to keep their blood sugar levels stable. Other aspects of treatment may include supportive therapy, like lifestyle and behavioral changes, psychotherapy, and possibly medication for moderate to severe emotional symptoms. If symptoms are severe enough that treatment with medication is appropriate, the individual will likely improve faster, more robustly, and for longer when medication is combined with psychotherapy.

Psychotherapy ("talk therapy") is a kind of mental-health counseling that entails working with a trained therapist to figure out ways to solve problems and cope with depression. It can be a powerfully effective intervention, even resulting in positive biochemical changes in the brain. Two major kinds of psychotherapy are commonly used to treat depression, anxiety, and other mental-health conditions and are therefore likely an effective intervention for duck syndrome: interpersonal psychotherapy and cognitive behavioral therapy. In general, these forms of treatment take weeks to months to complete and have a goal of alleviating depressive or anxiety symptoms. More intensive psychotherapy may be needed for longer when treating very severe mental-health symptoms.

Interpersonal therapy (IPT): This form of psychotherapy seeks to alleviate depressive or anxiety symptoms associated with duck syndrome by helping the sufferer develop more effective skills for coping with their emotions and relationships. IPT uses two strategies to achieve those goals:

  • Educating the person about the nature of their emotional symptoms: The therapist will reassure the sufferer that stress is a common phenomenon and that most people tend to improve with treatment.
  • Defining problems (such low self-confidence or relationship problems): Once problems are defined, the therapist can help the individual set realistic goals for solving these problems and work with him or her using different treatment techniques to reach these goals.
  • Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT): This approach to psychotherapy can help decrease the depression or anxiety that often presents as duck syndrome and the likelihood it will come back by helping a duck syndrome sufferer change his or her way of thinking about certain issues. In CBT, the therapist uses three techniques to achieve these goals.
  • Didactic component: This phase helps to establish positive expectations for treatment and promote the person's investment in the treatment process.
  • Cognitive component: This encourages understanding the thoughts and assumptions that play a role in the individual's behaviors, especially those that may predispose the sufferer to be depressed, anxious, or otherwise stressed.
  • Behavioral component: This uses behavior-modification techniques to teach the duck syndrome to suffer healthier, more effective ways of coping with problems.




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On The Way To Tallin


Hi buddies! I am writing this post this morning as I lay in my boat cabin on the way to Estonia for 48 hours. I did not leave the cabin since I arrived yesterday. I tried to relax and recharge for the next week as much as possible. I spent a cozy evening meditating, reading Mindwise book and listening to reiki healing music 

The internet wifi is not so fast onboard so I couldn't load the image for this post. I will visit my dentist in Tallin, walk around the medieval oldtown and explore, eat lunch at my favorite restaurant that serves truffle risotto. Until my return time comes in the evening. Once I am back to Stockholm tomorrow, I got my flight waiting in the evening. I am taking a week break to restore and repair myself among old friends and hometown culture. 

I am back on the defense survival mood again. Which is a strategy of living in denial and living positively open enjoying and focusing on the moment only and the next few steps forward. I am also so thankful for all the support I am getting from friends and family members. They are like gardening angels to me at this moment.

My summary of these days are. "The biggest favor you can do to yourself is, to be honest with it, confront your fears and try to understand yourself better. What you really want and what you do not want in life. The answers have to come from WITHIN not by anyone influence or effect." Let the journey of new self-discovery begin. Gratitude!




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Why So Serious?


First I would like to thank my loyal readers for keeping up with my stories. I noticed an increase in readers as I started writing my updates the past three months. Thank you again for the feedback, and this blog is like a home to me and a reflection of my soul. 



Whats better than laughter and fun that can release a lot of pent-up tension. Forget about the wicked past, overthinking and try not to analyze and make sense of everything. Laughter, fun, and joy are the perfect escape. Despite that I am 31 now, I still have my childlike humor and innocent which I am not planning to give up on. I guess Geminies always had that little "joker" type of personality in them, that gets triggered at the right time and specifically with the right people. I don't mean the type of wicked joker! I AM GENUINE, I don't do mind games or emotional manipulation. 

My thoughts for each day now are; keep focusing on self-love, personal success, and not doubt the current beauty which illuminates my emotions.  Follow my intuition, keep being open and authentic. And most importantly not look for perfection in situations or give attention to suspicions or fear.

Spiritually, once I started vibrating high last week, I manifested exactly what I have been looking for. The adventure, the freedom, honesty and the playfulness of it all. I am currently blessed and I cant ask for more! By the way, yesterday evening one of my friends sent me this crazy Gemini reading video that shocked the hell out of me and gave me goosebumps. The universe is f#€%ing with me big time XD.

The good housekeeper that I used to be. At this time of the year, I used to plant flowers and vegetables on the balcony, to prepare them for spring. This year the winter just extended more than it should. It's still snowing over here.

Julia and I are having lots of fun. Yesterday we had lunch at my favorite Thai restaurant with one of the friends and her son, did some shopping and spend some time at the kid's library. I did all my packing and sorted things out, it was funny I found some old small size jeans which I was shocked they fit me again. I guess the healthy eating and exercise routine was really effective. I keep taking small steps every day towards my humble goals. Buddies! Keep your vibration high and all the good will come your way.. gratitude!
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Live Your Happiness




I am back again with another diary post. As I mentioned in the previous one that I will be going surfing and then enjoy a relaxing spa time with outdoor jacuzzi while the snow is still outside, steam and wood sauna ect... This is one of the usual treats I enjoy here during the winter. I've had lots of fun lately. Now Julia is back home and we will be together alone the rest of the week having mom and daughter bonding time before I travel to Estonia.  

It's funny how while I was living in the Caribbean and the situation I was in, I forgot about a lot of the good qualities I had over here, it took just a good week to remind me. And that is including people and lifestyle, I almost forgot how much I really fit in, and I am sure I will be able to compare even more how much I have changed when I visit my old friends next week. When I say change I mean in how the cultural differences here influenced me the past 6 years. I am still "me" because of my unique life experiences, but somehow I got a Swedish side add to it now.  

When it comes to relationships/friendships for example! I find myself very open, direct and forward which is a factor that I do not see in my own people back where I come from. And this specific thing is what I actually look for in the people I want to have around me. My swedes are damn good at it XD and I like how I don't have to be confused around them as I get with others from conservative cultures and backgrounds. I am not generalizing!

I try now to not let my bad experiences overtake and make me define and judge others, or affect my new life decisions. Thanks to the brainstorming "long conversations" me and one of my friends had lately which helped me sperate past personal experience and frustration from what is actually out there for me now. It opened my eyes to a whole new perspective.

By the way, I will be taking with me some of the Swedish wild mushrooms I picked from the forest and other ingredients to my friends, to make them taste some of the Swedish cooking that I learned. Bottomline, I realized I love my life here more than I thought while living abroad... I adore the nature, the "hipster" forest wildlife and most importantly open people that I have chemistry and connect with. Regardless of the struggle with some career opportunities sometimes. But I will look at the full part of the glass as I always did, and let my heart guide me this time. Gratitude! 

This is my current mood these days, Hozier keeps me in a dreamy mood as I sip on my morning black coffee. There is a snow storm happening today, snowing none stop. Have a kick-ass Wednesday everyone!  (little Saturday in Swedish :-P)







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